A bully is someone who believes they have the right to exert power over somone else, and does. Why are you a bully?
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A bully is someone who believes they have the right to exert power over somone else, and does. Why are you a bully?
#1 by glenn at January 27th, 2006
I think that bullies are bullies because the current role models as adults are seriously lacking. The fact that our country is run by a bully, and that no one has seen fit to truly confront the bully, proving themselves as adults to be derelict in their duty as citizens(not everyone). Hardly inspiring, I guess as a weak populace we try to do things we think we might be successful at. The fact that we are where we are now, as a people, in defiance or ignorance of rules made Constitutionally, by people of courage, that we currently appear not to have, is the main reason any bully takes control. WE LET THEM! cheers glenn
#2 by Danielle Oviatt at April 10th, 2006
I would classify myself as having been more bullied than having bullied someone else, but there are instances, of which I am now horribly embarassed, in which I tried to exert dominance over others.
The people who bullied me hurt me a lot, even if they didn’t intend to and my dream was to inflict that same pain back on them. The instances where I could say I engaged in bullying behavior come down to that. To hurt them before they could hurt me. There were people who on reflection were trying to be nice to me whom I rejected because I thought they were just doing it as a joke so that they could laugh at how they fooled me and how I was so dumb. That wasn’t the case at all, but some earlier experiences sort of poisoned my outlook. I remember one incident in which I called a girl in gym class something unspeakably rude and prejudiced. At the time I thought she was just being mean to me. Looking back from an adult perspective and with knowledge about what was happening in her life at the time I can see it was very complex much more complex than that. She was probably partially jealous of me because my family had a lot more money than hers did, and also she didn’t really feel as if she fit in either. At the time, and now to some extent, I tried to difuse teasing by insulting myself first–and the very people who used to tease me asked me why I did it and I thought, “Well, duh, if you think I’m so worthless, why shouldn’t I think so too”– so she was merely mentioning the same things I mentioned about myself, probably in an attempt to relate to me. Anyway, she said something to me that made me so angry and hurt so much at the time that I thought of the one thing I could say to her that would hurt her the most, then said it. I though she was already out of the room so she wouldn’t hear me and I could blow off steam–albeit inappropriately–but she wasn’t. The next day I came into the locker room I got my head slammed into a locker and deserved it. If I could find this girl now I would apologize so profusely to her and try to explain that I was hurting a lot too even though it didn’t seem like it to her and that I just lashed out. I hope she would forgive me.
Basically I suspected the motive of virtually everyone, and reacted through that filter. I am not proud of what I did, and if anything I would qualify myself as a “Bully-Victim” rather than a pure bully, but this may be part of why some kids change roles.
#3 by Danielle Oviatt at April 10th, 2006
Also, I remember in about 2nd grade realizing that if you punched/hit/kicked someone you would get in trouble, but you could say virtually anything you want, as long as it wasn’t considered swearing, and even then it was iffy, and get away with it, even if it were the verbal equivalent of punching/hitting/kicking, etc. As someone who wasn’t very strong, wasn’t very popular, but was good with words and above average in reading and language, I ocassionally used it to my advantage. This is why it’s important to educate that violence can most definitely be verbal too and can hurt just as much.